Homecoming

Homecoming, I’m coming
My sweet mistake
Summer’s over, hope it’s not too late
I’m pacing, impatient
Up in my head
Taken back to the sidewalk where we met

And carved out our names
Do you remember that?

I’m coming home, I’m coming home
Did you take off while I was gone?
I missed it all, I messed you up, I missed you
I’m coming home, I wanna know
When all the leaves begin to fall
If I’m falling, falling apart for you

Descending, I’m spinning
Lost all defense
How could you swallow me again?
I left you, I meant to
Couldn’t let you in
Never mind a single word I said

Carve out your name
Do you remember that?

I’m coming home, I’m coming home
Did you take off while I was gone?
I missed it all, I messed you up, I missed you.
I’m coming home, I wanna know
When all the leaves begin to fall
If I’m falling, falling apart

You’ve got control of me
Is this the end of me?
‘Cause I just can’t cut up the strings
I’m coming back for more
Don’t let your heart go
Please don’t walk away

Homecoming, I’m coming, I’m coming back

I’m coming home, I’m coming home
Did you take off while I was gone?
I missed it all, I messed you up, I missed you
I’m coming home, I wanna know
When all the leaves begin to fall
If I’m falling, falling apart
I’m coming home, I’m coming home
Did you take off while I was gone?
I missed it all, I messed you up, I missed you.
I’m coming home, I wanna know
When all the leaves begin to fall
If I’m falling, falling apart

-------------------------

I had a giant "What the fuck am I going to do?" moment today.

Candles

The power lines went out
And I am all alone
But I don't really care at all
Not answering my phone
All the games you played
The promises you made
Couldn't finish what you started
Only darkness still remains

Lost sight
Couldn't see
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright

Been black and blue before
There's no need to explain
I am not the jaded kind
Playback's such a waste
You're invisible
Invisible to me
My wish is coming true
Erase the memory of your face

Lost sight
Couldn't see
When it was you and me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright
One day
You will wake up
With nothing but "you're sorrys"
And someday
You will get back
Everything you gave me

Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
I'm beginning to see the light
Blow the candles out
Looks like a solo tonight
But I think I'll be alright

---------------------------------

This whole week has been kind of grey. Hardly any sun, and full of cold air. I can't lie and say I hate it. But I'm starting to forget what sun looks like. I miss the way the sun hits my face.

Lately, I've been wondering about life. What else is new？As individuals, we are taught to make our own decisions, to take responsibility. Everything in life is in our control. When things don't go the way they're supposed to, are we at fault？ Or, is it fate? Is it possible to have both exist? Where is the line drawn? How do we know if it's one, and not the other? Oh the unanswered questions in life. A couple weeks ago, I was in the car with my dad, waiting for my mom to be done work. I asked my dad, "Are you at where you thought you would be when you were, let's say, 25?". Not to my surprise, he said, "No". I didn't really question him about it, but I was sure that he had bigger dreams than to have 3 kids and support a family for the rest of his life. It kinda made me wonder whether it's worth dreaming, only to have it shatter years later. But when we dream the impossible dream, are we setting ourselves up for the let down? Or are we setting ourselves for the invisible alternative of happiness? When we choose to go down a path that wasn't intended, it can only lead to opportunities that wouldn't have come with the 'right' path. So for now, I'm going to dream the impossible dream. Ask me in 10 years how it goes.