It's Alright, It's OK

You told me
There's no need
To talk it out
Cause its too late
To proceed
And slowly
I took your words

No looking back
I wont regret, no
I will find my way
I'm broken
But still I have to say

It's Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry
Alright, OK
So don't you bother what I do
No matter what you say
I wont return
Our bridge has burned down
I'm stronger now
Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry

You played me
Betrayed me
Your love was nothing but a game
Portrait a role
You took control, I
I couldn't help but fall
So deep
But now I see things clear

It's Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry
Alright, OK
So don't you bother what I do
No matter what you say
I wont return
Our bridge has burned down
I'm stronger now
Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry

Don't waist you fiction tears on me
Just save them for someone in need
It's Way to late
I'm closing the door

It's Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry
Alright, OK
So don't you bother what I do
No matter what you say
I wont return
Our bridge has burned down
I'm stronger now
Alright, OK
I'm so much better without you
I won't be sorry

It's Alright, OK
Alright, OK
Without you
No matter what you say
It's Alright, OK
Alright, OK
Without you
I won't be sorry

-------------------------

When I find myself in a hole, I consciously keep myself there. I isolate myself completely from those close to me. I think I just need time to gather my thoughts and to seriously think things over. Being close to other people, talking to people close to me, somehow makes things worse off. I don't like talking things over. Cutting people off avoids the need for me to put on a fake smile. Self-sabotage? Most likely. But necessary.

I hate myself for changing, only for a moment, and becoming someone I am not proud of. I hate myself for thinking that I am different than my family, for throwing away my values. I hate the fact that I never listen and how I think I know best. I look back at hopeful 16 year old I once was, full of hope and aspirations, and wish I could tell myself that it's not real. I get what I deserve in life. I don't deserve anything more.

Franklin

And when we get home, I know we won't be home at all
This place we live, it is not where we belong
And I miss who we were in the town that we could call our own
Going back to get away after everything has changed

Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive?
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
(Everything has changed)
Could you help me push aside all that I have left behind?
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?

So we stand here now and no one knows us at all
I won't get used to this
I won't get used to being gone
And going back won't feel the same if we aren't staying
Going back to get away after everything has changed

Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive?
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
(Everything has changed)
Could you help me push aside all that I have left behind?
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?

Taking up our time
Taking up our time
Taking up our time
It's taking up our time again
Go back we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time again
Go back we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time again
Go back we can't go back at all
It's taking up our time, taking up our time

Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive?
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?

-----------------------

It's been a while since a very good blog. No promises here. Haha. Anyways, September is upon us and we soon go back to routine. I love routine. I love knowing how my day is going to go, knowing when it's going to end. Love it! Anyways, lately I've been in a slump. I'm finding myself in isolation all the time. Consciously of course. I'm in need of a really good laugh.

On another note, I've started another blog: healthyisbeauty.blogspot.com
It's pretty much a boring diary for my path of healthiness. I hope that it provides me the commitment I need to be healthier.

On Fire

They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you'll need to leave
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows
There's more than what you've heard
There's so much more than empty conversations
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire
When he's near you
You're on fire
When He speaks
You're on fire
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything You are
Give me one more chance to be... (near You)

Cause everything inside me looks like
Everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire
When you're near me
I'm on fire
When you speak
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
These mysteries...

I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of everything I've never been before.
And I've been standing on the edge of me
Standing on the edge

And I'm on fire
When you're near me
I'm on fire
When you speak
(Yea) I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries... these mysteries... these mysteries
Ah you're the mystery
You're the mystery

--------------------

I said I wouldn't be sorry for my imperfections, but I am. I hate my fucking external locus of control. I have to be better.

If You Wanted A Song Written About You, All You Had To Do Was Ask

I'm throwing away pictures
That I never should have taken in the first place
And it's cold in my apartment
As I'm changing all the colors
From the brightest reds to grays

Well it's 3 o'clock on monday morning
I'm just hoping you're not seeing his face
I've been getting calls in these hotel rooms
Long enough to know that it was him
That took my place

And I hope this makes you happy now
That the flame we had is burning out
And I hope you like your pictures facing down
As even broken hearts may have their doubts

And I'm burning all the letters
Hoping that I might forget her and her bad taste
That she left when she was leaving me
A life of barely breathing as she walked
Out of this place

And you dropped the note and we changed key
You changed yourself and I changed me
I really didn't see us singing through this
Then you screamed the bridge
And I cried the verse
And our chorus came out unrehearsed
And you smiled the whole way through it
I guess maybe that's what's worse

And I hope this makes you happy now
That the flame we had is burning out
And I hope you like your pictures facing down
As even broken hearts may have their doubts

And I'm taking all your memories off the shelf
And I don't need you or anybody else
So take a look at me
See what you want to see
When you get home

Take me home
I'd rather die than be with you
Take me home
You have a problem with the truth
Take me home
Because this happens every time
I knew it would...
I knew it would...

Take me home
I'd rather die than be with you
Take me home
You have a problem with the truth
Take me home
Because this happens every time
And I knew it would...
I knew it would...

And I hope this makes you happy now
That the flame we had is burning out
And I hope you like your pictures facing down
As even broken hearts may have their doubts

And I'm taking all your memories off the shelf
And I don't need you or anybody else
So take a look at me
See what you want to see
When you get home

--------------------------

Finally, I have finished my summer course! Now, two-ish weeks of summer left! Must spend it well.

I have nothing to say, so this entry sucks. Sorry.